The Aggressive Child Controlled or Collateral Parenting? tips for parents

Parents freeze in mid-sentence. Teachers bite back words. Grandparents grit their teeth. Society suck in their cheeks. Aggressive children are on the increase. The upward eye-roll is their way of tolerating the adults around them. We see them in our daily routines and at social gatherings. Children turn up beautifully dressed with their family and within half an hour, blood curdling yells, sulking princesses and tear-stained faces dot the scenery. Perplexed adults rush to pacify the pained little people only to find themselves in the midst of trying to calm anxious parents.

Words : Shanthi Wijesinghe

Why are children aggressive ? 

Why, indeed. It is their natural being. They are uncut gems which need careful polishing to bring on the brilliant facets of human qualities. Well yes, one may question the latter. To the pessimist, I say, there still exists great human qualities amidst us all. Back to the question, why are children aggressive? Too often, they are being given into every demand which makes them feel exalted and revered. To the young mind, this ego is created by the adults around. It makes the child feel the world is his oyster. As he grows this belief does not diminish. However, the adult’s expectations and impatience grows thin. Then begins the decent to negative behaviour. To the uninformed adults this is disastrous. They grow to turn away or clam up in the face of such behaviour. Little correction is made which leads to the child becoming the unbearable adult.
Aggression in children take many forms: tantrums; hitting, kicking, or biting; loud verbal outbursts that destroy property; cool-headed bullying; verbal attacks; attempts to control others through threats or violence.Tame or Train ? Train. Taming does not lead to positive outcomes. When training happens, children become more aware of their actions and reactions. The training lies in the give and take. A child needs to give when he takes. It’s that simple. 

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